The day i learnt to blast freeze my wants

"When was this food prepared?" I asked the smart 6 foot flight attendant, with a name tag Abhay, who was happily serving hot breakfast to starved souls on an early morning flight from Chennai to Delhi at the beginning of autumn season and my entrepreneurial life. When an equally smart flight attendant pushing the food trolley from the other side stopped by my seat with a tray in her hand and asked in a sweet but stern voice, "Mr Palanidurai, did you request for a vegetarian meal?", I decided, unconsciously, to have a second breakfast and said, "Yes, I did". Her name tag read Swati and she meant business and moved on swiftly to serve the next passenger.

When I received that tray from her, a deep feeling of guilt killed the joy I had experienced 2 hours earlier when I heard  my name called on the announcement system at Chennai domestic airport. I was relishing the, visa credit card sponsored, ₹2 buffet breakfast in the travel lounge when that announcement instilled a sense of urgency in me to rush to the boarding gate. But, when I realized there was still 30 minutes left for departure, the frequent traveler in me relaxed my mind and  cajoled it to send an instruction to finish that bowl of hot and freshly prepared porridge to wash down that small portion of pongal, 2 mini vadas and a Gujarati thepla that entered my digestive system a few minutes back!

Yes, I was a tad bit hungry that morning; to explore the breakfast spread and life beyond 22 years in the IT industry that gave me an opportunity to learn, earn and the wisdom to get off the bus before I get churned. 

Abhay, quickly realized that I was still waiting for his response and in a mild but confident tone said, "I am not entirely sure sir, but most likely food on this morning flight would have been prepared around midnight and kept blast frozen till delivery to this flight". I acknowledged him with a smile but could not digest the answer I received. The food was prepared roughly 12 hours before, kept frozen and reheated a hour back, probably twice!

At that point I had a choice,

A) To return the tray and let go of  my want (to have a second breakfast) even though it had Aloo Parantha that I was longing to eat the previous night at home, presented and offered to me nicely with a customer friendly smile
B) To go ahead and have it to fulfill my desire to write a short story about my experience in the remaining 90 mins of the flight time.

Now that you are reading it, I obviously chose option B. This experience did feed my desire and energized me to type away 1500 words of wisdom before I landed in Delhi. It also gave me an opportunity to introspect and increased my appetite to research a particular trait of  human behavior.

"Why do people mostly succumb to desires of a want even when their need is already met?"

I am a mature foodie who has been trained well by my health conscious wife over the last 15 years to not be greedy and jump at free food. So, why did I not say, "No, thank you" to Swati? What influenced me to react immediately and receive that tray? 

- Was it the way the food was packaged and presented nicely with lot of goodies? 

- Was it that beautiful smile both flight attendants beamed in-spite of not having received last month salary as the airline was going through tough times?

- Could it be my urge to, once again, taste that tamarind toffee unique to that airline and feel that tangy burst in my mouth and mind? 

- Was it my hangover behavior from the extensive travel from the corporate life that I left behind a month back? 

- Could it be the peer pressure of co-passengers next to me choosing to take that  breakfast? 

- I remembered reading an article that people digest food quickly when they think a lot, could it be that? It was less than 2 hours since I had my first breakfast, though!

As, i was searching for a convincing answer I heard a mature voice that came from behind the row I was seated. "I had my breakfast at home, so, I will not need the full tray. Instead, can I just have that bar of KitKat chocolate, if that is possible?"  I recognized the voice that responded; it was Swati who served me my breakfast but did not offer an opportunity for me to strike a conversation. This time she paused for a bit and in a friendly tone replied to him, "Ofcourse, sir. You can actually have 2 of those. Is there anything else, I can offer you?"

Within a few seconds we all felt a slight bump as the aircraft shivered a bit, swayed for 10 seconds before stabilizing and cruising again. I suddenly heard a voice above my head, it was the captain speaking. "Sorry about that mild discomfort you may have felt. We just flew into heavy clouds and experienced air turbulence. The sky is all clear now and we are cruising above Mathura town and should be reaching our destination in about 30 minutes. Sit back and relax and enjoy your breakfast and our award winning in-flight service".

I looked down at the tray in front of me that was well laid out with a piece of bread, butter, a rectangular bowl wrapped in a green silver foil that was releasing mild steam from a small opening in its corner, a KitKat chocolate, disposable water bottle and hiding behind those plastic cutlery that tangy tamarind toffee. I recognized the trademark wrap in the shape of 2 small beads. I first reached for the water to wet my mouth and mind both of which had become dry processing all those thoughts running in my thirsty brain! 

I could hear a rumbling in my stomach. Was it hunger or anxiety? I could not differentiate but my hands were already opening the green wrapper on which I had kept the butter to melt. The flavor of Indian spices filled the air and before my mind could send any more signals I started spreading that butter on the parantha and took a bite! Just when I was about to send that mouthful down to my mid chamber I saw Abhay approaching me. I quickly swallowed to free up the voice chamber and ducts incase I had to interact with him. But, he stopped by the row in front of me and with a sorry face and an apologetic tone said to the gentlemen in front of me. "I am really sorry sir, we do not have any more vegetarian meal left. We had to cater to all passengers who had pre-booked it. I can offer you omelette and baked beans. Would you like me to bring it?". After few minutes of contemplation that gentleman declined that offer and asked for another bottle of water. He realized Abhay tried but was not in a position to help as he should have pre-booked his vegetarian meal, which he knew was his  staple need.

The rumbling in my stomach was even louder now and this time I knew it was not hunger. I could have helped fulfill the need of that gentleman if I knew how to blast freeze my wants, in this case my urge to have a second breakfast. The next 15 mins was filled with deep introspection and flashback of events from my life when I was faced with such dilemma and what I eventually did in those circumstances. I came back to reality in mid air when I heard Abhay again, "Sir, can I take the tray? We will be landing shortly". I noticed my co-passengers had already finished their breakfast and were reading something. Abhay had given me some grace time to finish my breakfast and came back to collect my food tray. I took my favorite tamarid toffee and KitKat and returned my empty food tray.

I popped those tamarind beads in my mouth while watching Abhay walk back to the cabin crew area and settling down in his seat and buckling up for landing. The tangy juice sent a burst of tangy flavors down my throat and I could feel a state of joy and contentment. The voice above my head returned and filled the air with more joy. "We have reached our destination and 10 mins ahead of schedule..."

My happy state of mind did not let the body feel the usual thud of aircraft landing. Instead it filled me with a sense of satisfaction for not only reaching my destination safely but also for having learnt a new life lesson to blast freeze my wants and re-heat them when they actually become a need. An ability when mastered could help sustain the joyful state of mind and fulfill my quest for happiness!

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©Balaji Palanidurai
I wrote this shorty story based on my own experience onboard Jet Airways flight 9W 736 on 25th Oct 2018 from Chennai to Delhi. This flight was a personal milestone for me as it was the first business trip I took for my own venture and I was glad it was on Jet Airways, on which I had taken my first domestic flight way back in 2001!

After many international travels and lot of flight time utilized to network/read/learn and introspect I was looking forward to the experience that morning. I boarded with an open mind, which widened further when I landed. The experience helped me write about something that I talk about a lot with my friends and family and especially kids. I used to take many life examples as an analogy and that morning I became my own student and learnt a lesson; to take a pause and consciously differentiate between my "Needs" and "Wants" and how to control the urge to go after the Wants!

#jetairways #joyofflying

கண்டுகொண்டேன், கண்டுகொண்டேன்

கண்டுகொண்டேன், கண்டுகொண்டேன்

இப்பிறப்பின் இலக்கை நான் கண்டுகொண்டேன்

பாரம்பரியத்தை நோக்கி "ஒற்றன் பாதை" 

என்ற விளம்பரம் ஒன்று கண்டேன்

அச்சுற்றுப்பயணத்தின் நடத்துனர் என் நண்பன் 

என்பதில் பெருமிதம் கொண்டேன்

தமிழ் பாரம்பரியத்துக்கு உரிய 

அழகையும் பெருமையையும் கண்டேன்

அதை பார்த்து, உணர்ந்து மகிழ 

புதியதோர் உற்சாகம் கொண்டேன்

உலகம் போற்றும் இலக்கியம் மற்றும்

 பேரரசர்களின் சிலைகள் கண்டேன்

அவற்றை அறிந்து, உணர்ந்து வாழ 

மனதிலோர் உறுதி கொண்டேன்

நமது வரலாறு மற்றும் கலாச்சாரத்தை 

விவரிக்கும் கல்வெட்டுகள் பல கண்டேன்

இவை மரபுவழியில் தொலைைந்து விடுமோ என்ற அச்சம் கொண்டேன்

பயணத்தில் இரு சிட்டுகள் தம் தந்தையின் 

தோள்களில் உலா வருவதை கண்டேன்

இளைய தலைமுறை இனி தலைதூக்கி

திகழும் என நிம்மதி கொண்டேன்

பழமையின் புதுமையை அறிய உணர்த்தும்

கருவிகள் உபயோகத்தில் கண்டேன்

பழமையில் புதுமை காணும் தொழில்நுட்பத்தை 

ஊக்குவிக்க உறுதி கொண்டேன்

கண்டுகொண்டேன், கண்டுகொண்டேன்

இப்பிறப்பின் இலக்கை நான் கண்டுகொண்டேன்


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©Balaji Palanidurai

This poem is inspired by the "Beauty of our heritage" poem I wrote. I received a lot of positive feedback and appreciation for the deep meaning in that. I also received few requests to write a similar one in Tamil and this is it. I wrote this in a few hours on the morning of 28th July when I stumbled upon a WhatsApp message from a friend that had links to an article about Tamil influence in Japan and Thailand.

So, I would like to dedicate this poem to my friends Clement Anand Rajaratnam (father of Ottran Padhai) and Sandhya Aravind (Founder of ChapterTwo Life coaching) whose WhatsApp message expedited this creation.

Beauty of our heritage

Beauty of heritage is in the synergy

of tradition, buildings & language
Duty of people lies in their energy
to cascade it with pride & assuage

Diverse, are cities we live in, where
time & people move rampant & fast
Immerse, they do in routines, their 

yesterday seems like a distant past

No wonder, traditions with hardly
any existence or of age
Becomes a fashion and smartly
many call it their heritage

Buildings, preserved over ancestry
through care and diligence
Transformed into abode with luxury
throw culture in negligence

Tradition & values etched on stones
narrate to us many a story
Expeditions far & many, for thrones
curate for us a hearty history

Big temples & forts of supremacy
defied laws of nature & invasions
Stand testimony to our democracy
defined rules for modern inventions

Beauty of heritage is in the synergy
of tradition, buildings & language
Duty of people lies in their energy
to cascade it with pride & assuage

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©Balaji Palanidurai
I wrote this poem after a heritage tour I went on 20-22 July 2018 Ottran Padhai (#OttranPadhai). It was to visit heritage sites of The Cholas and beautifully curated by a good (and crazy) friend of mine, themed on a famous novel "Ponniyin Selvan" by Kalki.

I started feeling like someone from that era. It kicked off an urge to find my ancestry, which I kind of know I have that roots. This, in turn, added fuel to my quest for my heritage!

Joy of listening together

I feel the humble mobile earphones have a magical quality to unite people and bring about happiness. Looks like I am not the only one to think so as you can see from this cartoon created by lastlemon.com (Thank you guys for having created exactly what I had in mind. Hope you don't mind me referencing it on my blog!)

I was on the upper deck of a train from Chennai to Bengaluru, on a cool November morning, seated with 9 co-passengers on the only row with 2 tables surrounded by 10 seats. 6 seats on one side and 4 on the other. I was on the table with 6 seats, lucky to get the aisle seat but unfortunately facing in the opposite direction of the journey. I looked out the window and felt like being dragged from behind at 100kms per hour with green fields, coconut trees and rocky hills whizzing past me one after another, which made me feel dizzy.

To distract that dragging feeling I diverted my sleepy eyes to the inside of the coach only to find many pair of eyes staring at me. Their size, intensity and curiosity varied and were in sync with their corresponding built. But, there was something common among most of them, almost all of them. They all had an earphone hanging from their ears in various colors, white being the dominant. The thin wire from the jack of their mobile phones split into two with a molded earphone at both ends that found a resting place on the ears of their respective owners. Well, not all of them. I noticed a few that were branching out to two people, carrying audio signals to 2 minds united in the pursuit of happiness. Be it watching a YouTube video or listening to classical music or collaborating on a business presentation.

A mild humming male sound from my right got my attention and to avoid being seen like one of those curious souls, I glanced in the direction without turning my head. The sight was so beautiful that my head turned automatically ignoring the "don't do it" signals from my brain. There was this lovely south Indian couple, old by their looks but young at heart listening to some classical song whose lyrics was scrolling on the smartphone the beautiful lady was holding on her left hand. The old man was humming a song and the lady was tapping on the table with fragile fingers manicured with turmeric powder. It felt like she was tapping in sync with husband's humming listening to it through her right ear. Her left ear was holding one of the earphone and the other was plugged on his right ear. His left ear was free and possibly listening to her tapping with those tender fingers that he held for life some 50+ years back. Their eyes were closed and they were nodding in harmony enjoying something they loved doing together feeling happy and not worried about what the world in front of them will think! 

Touched by the beautiful scene and to avoid my tears of joy becoming visible to the young man in front of me, I quickly turned towards my left. Was it a coincidence? A similar scene was waiting for me on that side too. Diagonally opposite were two young ladies neatly dressed in colorful salwar kameez sharing an earphone plugged into one of their mobiles. Their expression was different to that of the older couple, which was expected. They were mostly glued to the screen of the iPhone 5s and whatever they were seeing brought on them frequent smiles and at times a loud giggle or two. I could only guess that they were watching some funny movie but what I could see for sure was happiness, being shared together.

Just curious to see if this was not a dream I jumped out my narrow seat only to knock my knees on the table that sent a sharp signal of pain to my brain. That assured me it was not a dream and with a slight limp I walked on the narrow strip in the middle of closely arranged seats on both sides, 3 on one side and 2 on the other. To my surprise there were a few more such scenes of joy, listening and watching together. Two young boys wearing similar shirts, possibly a uniform of the company they worked for, laughing out loud in unison. A family with a small boy enjoying the classic Tom and Jerry on a Samsung galaxy tab. The mother partaking in the episode without audio as both earphones were used by the father and the lad! I wondered, why no one has invented an earphone with three earpieces yet? That would help mothers like her to be not sacrifice her feelings for the sake of her family. 

The joy and happiness were contagious as I started smiling myself until I passed a few guys wearing formals and classy ties glued to their laptop looking serious and frantically typing something on the keyboard. Well, they too had earphones plugged, but to themselves. Were they listening to music to cut sound originating from speed typing? There was another gentleman watching a movie on his laptop computer. The small curve at the end of his lips gave away his happy feeling, which I am sure would have been a burst of laughter if he was watching it with someone.

As I retreated back to my seat I thought about all those moments when I listened to my favorite song "Happy" by Pharrell Williams on my smartphone with headphones and clapping my hands in joy. My wife would pass by me wondering what happened to her husband. Next time I am going to drag her to the side and plug one earphone on her soft ear and see what happens! I hope we will experience the joy of listening together!

©Balaji Palanidurai

Paid leaves not there to be left!

Paid, privileged or personal we call those days we get or allocate as leave 

They are there to be used and not to be hidden in our sleeve

22, 28 or 30 the number depends whether you work in private or public

Alas, some countries include in it days you end up in bed being sick!

Accumulate & en-cash some do, I heard a young lady say to me once

Late & ash they would be before they realize its not worth a pence

Use them every year with friends and family; however insane or wise

Excuse yourself from work & daily life to prevent black around your eyes

yatra, expedia and makemytrip are throwing up huge discount

Mantra there is none to book a trip and make those memories count!

Beach, heritage, culture, city break & for summer there is a hill station

Try it out my friends, a duet with nature could become a secret passion!

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©Balaji Palanidurai
Composed on 13th May 2017 – onboard a jetairways fight from Delhi to Chennai at the end of my 2 week Passion Leave!

Bread

Soft, crisp, round & square;
people eat bread
Depends, where they were
born and bred!

Relished with breakfast, lunch, dinner
or even as a starter
Getting a small piece of it, for some,
is still a big matter!

8000 CE, the grain was first crushed
battered and baked in an oven

Flat at first, from Egypt to the world
it evolved; the method was proven

French call it baguette, Egyptians as pitta,
Indian double roti and English as bread

What's in a name? When hunger strikes
humanity and hospitality must spread.

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©Balaji Palanidurai

I wrote this poem on 27th April 2017. The trigger was the scene in front of me on the breakfast table by the window in StayAt Bromma overlooking the street leading to the Bromma train station. I was there on business trip and stayed there for 2 weeks. Breakfast was simple and had a continental spread and I loved the butter there!

The slice of bread and the salt and pepper dispensers in ghost form in front of me got me to think about the importance of bread in our life. I also became a fan of the Crisp bread and started googling for history of bread. I wanted to save this information for my future reference and wrote it in a format that I would like to read - Poem!

Open spaces, closed minds

"It's a small world", a phrase we use
When we meet people from faraway land.
"Narrow minded", the phrase we use
When we see people with blood in hand.

We read then about battles fought over
love and pride in mythology and history.
We read now about war fought over
Ideology, hate & other reasons, a mystery.

Machines we invented to rear the herd,
sail the sea and pierce the air.
Machines used to plough through a crowd
before they realize, is totally unfair.

Freedom of choice,humanity & compassion
It's taught in closed spaces with open mind.
Freedom by choice, cruelty and execution
It's sought in open spaces with closed mind.

"It's a big world" with billions aboard
and more to come, open spaces not many.
"Open minded" let's become and,
live and let live with peace and harmony.

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©Balaji Palanidurai

Submitted to WAX Poetry in September 2017

Sentiments from Singapore bird park

Back to pavilion after romancing with 600 species of birds from the world! 
My experience holding those birds on my hands brought out words from my heart..

Here is a poem that I think you might find cool

Wish i did this trip when I was in school

Birds, some thriving amidst humble caretakers and loving guest,   🤗
While some seem to be missing its natural habitat & sunlight was its quest

(all penguins were looking towards sunroof!!)

People applauded when the parrots were made to speak,

I felt they were more beautiful when hanging on its beak!

Joy and excitement among scores of people on the night safari

When they learnt only 600 tigers are left all felt very sorry

I saw 6 black elephants preserved through donated dollors($)

Else, in a few years they will decorate our shelves in various colors!

Glad I made this trip during Chinese new year

Else, it would be a fancy from what I read and hear   ☺️

Lots of acquaintance and few friends 

I will endeavor my connect with them never ends!

©Balaji Palanidurai

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